Fulfilling Your Daily Actual News Requirement
In West Palm Beach, Florida, Krispy Kreme is doing a promotion that will reward students with a doughnut for every A they receive on their report cards, up to six doughnuts per term. There are already people up in arms about how there are more nutritious things to reward students with doughnuts.
"Krispy Kreme doughnuts are very good, especially when the 'hot' lights are on, but I can't say that there's anything healthy about them," school board member Debra Robinson said Tuesday. "Can't we find something else? I mean a doughnut?"Editorial
This lady is just the sort of person who gives out toothpaste for Halloween and gets upset when she takes her kids out trick-or-treating and gets upset when homeowners don't have a non-candy alternative. It's not like Heckler & Koch is giving away pistols to students; it's just donuts. And it's not like Krispy Kreme is giving away a lifetime supply to the valedictorian or forcing the students to eat the doughnuts they earn. We're talking about a simple promotion that involves giving goods away for free as a reward for student-achievement... and the School Board has a problem with it.
I might have my priorities all fucked-up, here, and maybe this is why I'll never get elected to my own local school board, but I think that any reward for student achievement is a good thing. It's like how people can decry the books of Stephen King, but high school students love them, and quite often it's the closest thing to literature that they'll willingly subject themselves to without anyone looking over their shoulders. I mean, twelve doughnuts a year isn't going to kill anyone, and -in the event that it did- it's a goddamn miracle that student didn't die running laps in gym class.